So my cell phone rang and my husband says the cows have doubled back and are headed my way. Well, no, I wasn’t about to let them get by me.

I grew up in Edgefield, SC with cows, goats, pigs, chickens and a beagle named Cleo. No hard-headed heifer was coming back where I was.

I eased down the hill and here they came. That one heifer was leading the way. I really should have gotten her tag number.

She came out of the trees and stopped. She stared at me and I stared back. We were both about five feet from the fence and she was most certainly on the wrong side. I spoke to her. I was social and polite; she was, after all, just one of the neighbors.

“You are not coming back this way. You must go back the way you came.” I was so friendly. It was almost like we could have a little conversation; sort of some one-sided girl talk. She stared a minute and then side stepped closer to the fence. I didn’t know a cow could side step. It was as if she thought she could ease by me and go on.  Really? I grew up with three brothers as well as raising two sons. I knew THAT move. I just never saw a cow do it. So when she side stepped, I matched her maneuver and very firmly repeated myself. “You are NOT coming back this way.”

I still wish I’d had a video camera. She whirled around and bucked, snorted and threw her rear end in the air! It was hilarious! I’ve seen rodeo footage where a wild horse could buck and throw its rider, but a cow?

So my fridge has a sticky note with a phone number and I’m thankful for good “cow” neighbors.

My newest neighbors share a property line farther up the hill from where the cows escaped. We’ve laughed about the bovines but she told me, “When we pour the concrete for the floor of the apartment, help me pray. I really don’t want cow prints in the wet cement.”

Life in the country. It’s hard for some people to understand how eight acres can feel like a postage stamp. Having lived places where people share a wall with another family and the front yard is a sidewalk, it’s very plain to me that this girl will never be happy anywhere but the boonies.

Until next time, I’ll be Rambling On.

This was written in May 2017


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